You bring up those "physical parts" that your bf can't change and you won't have to have sex with him anymore anyway. The way things are right now, either she gets to dump him when she's fed up with being unsatisfied, or stick with him and be unhappy. What are you doing to make your sex life exciting and fulfilling for both of you?Unless you are someone who needs that then you might have to consider the future. If someone's not attracted to me sexually, and feel like they're settling, I WANT TO KNOW. I also think that you're misinterpreting the high-intensity drama of your ex as "passion" and "intensity", when in reality, your dynamic was toxic, you were desperate to connect with him emotionally, and the only place you felt that way was between the sheets.So much that it actually hurts my current sex life.
He was really handsome and we had explosive sex, and like your ex, he treated me badly.
Sometime a perfectly gentle and caring bf who attends to each and every one of your needs does not translate well in bed.
I honestly do not think its a size issue, from the sounds of it, the ex was dominating in bed as he was in the relationship and that is what turned the OP on the most.
Communication is key, ESPECIALLY in the bedroom, but your ex doesn't need to be a part of that to get your point across.
Aybe instead of comparing him to your ex, you could try to find ways to help him improve? DON' T TELL YOUR BOYFRIEND ANY OF THESE THOUGHTS You will lose him if you do. If you want to do new things in bed, or you want him to adjust your technique, then go to /r/sex for communication tips.
Search for thedatingchicks com:
All of this is to say that high emotions and drama can make for good sex, but is it possible you sort of overcorrected and picked someone so safe that he doesn't challenge you or engage you?